Thanksgiving

It turned out to be soooo cold on Thanksgiving and I was pretty miserable about it.  I awoke with that ache in my arm pit and bicep again knowing that I could not take any Hydrocodone because I would be driving to see my husband's extended family and I was out of Tylenol.  There were carrots to cook, stuffing to prep, pineapple to chop, and both myself and Tristan to get ready.  My husband was offered a sweet deal if he would work on Thanksgiving and we needed the cash for Christmas so took it.  He told me that I didn't have to drive out to his grandmother's (about 30 minutes away in a little rural town). but this being Wayne's mom I knew it would please him in heaven to see me make the effort.   I also knew despite the general lack of "Traditional Thanksgiving" stuff that occurs at this family's events Tristan needs some sense of extended family.  I woke up kind of late for me and though there was still plenty of time to do the cooking, prepping, and getting ready, there was much less time available for waking up slowly over my coffee. I got a call about a hour before I was supposed to be there wondering if I was almost there, and informing me that everyone else was there and ready to eat.  I was a little frustrated and in a lot of pain.  Finally, I had the food, Tristan and I in the car.  I am panicking a little because I've only driven this route once and this house is in the sticks on an actual Dairy Farm.  It was my son who chilled me out by saying, "Mom! Please stop rushing us!  I apologized to him and agreed to let it go.  I got there only 5 minutes past the time it was supposed to start. and everyone was very done eating.  They said, "I guess you shouldn't have even brought anything."  Imagine silent screaming.  I did my best to be social despite constantly being questioned about why I was or was not eating a certain thing.  Truthfully, most of that food, I don't like.  There was not one green vegetable or non sugar coated veggie on the table.  And I wonder why my father-in-law never ate fruits or veggies.  I made it through the loud rough housing and the racial prejudices and headed home.  That evening I attempted to create a special Thanksgiving meal for my own family.  We sat at the table, enjoyed good healthy and less healthy food :), and talked the entire time about stuff we were thankful for, happy about, mad about, and wanted for ourselves. My family does Not have a problem communicating our feelings about anything!  I am quite proud of that.  I desperately want us to really know each other, and hopefully these habits will carry us through the years of "difficult" discussions and disagreements that will arise.  My husband became more and more somber and sad as the night went on which I took quite personally having worked sooooo hard to make everyone else happy that day.  He was missing his dad, his big family get together's on his mom's side of the family (that normally take place), and his grandmother.  His grandmother died this year and his dad died three years ago.  The holidays just seem lost to him.  The families used to gather together to see their mother(his grandmother) and now that she is gone they are choosing more to stay with their own families(children and grandchildren) and avoid the traveling.  I didn't know what to do to cheer him up and he was still moody when I woke up at 2:30am to go Black Friday shopping.  I love this man.  He loves me.  When either of us is out of sorts the other is as well.  We've always been that way.  We are as connected as two individuals can be.  Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually, Academically, etc.    He got better though and we had some good family time that afternoon and evening.  After our son was in bed I decided to take a bath due to some very sore breasts, arms, and underarms, in hopes of relaxing.  When I got out he had all the lights off in the living room except the Christmas lights on the garland resting on the mantle, a big candle, and a roaring fire.  He had made us some drinks and we settled in for duel foot massages and a movie.  I love my Man.